starbucks and a noah's bagels

"starbucks and a noah's bagels" | Sunday, September 16, 2001 | No. 1,081
spigot: I WOULD LIKE YOU TO WEDGE YOUR BALLS AGAINST EITHER SIDE OF MY FACE LIKE A STARBUCKS AND A NOAH'S BAGELS
deuce: I DON'T THINK I LIKE THIS GAME ANYMORE (CLEARLY NOT SPACE INVADERS)
spigot: THE NEIGHBORHOOD SURROUNDING MY MOUTH AND LEGS HAS REALLY GENTRIFIED
deuce: GENTRIFIED: A WORD THAT HAS NEVER BEEN USED ON JERKCITY BEFORE
spigot: THAT JUST PROVES I'VE GOT A PIONEERING SPIRIT







Tomorrow
"every building should have" starring spigot




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"Slurping and drooling and hurrrr."



Est. 1998
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Cosmic forces (otherwise known as "bonghits") are at work here.
Jerkcity was not supposed to have continued through 2017.
It should be clear to all that mistakes were made somewhere.