spigot: "SOAKED" "DRENCHED" "SHOWERED" spigot: FOLKS IF IT DRIBBLES IT LEADS spigot: PARKER spigot: GET ME PICS OF SPIDERMAN PISSING ON PEOPLE

pants: I LIKE THE CAREFUL CRAFTING OF EVERY JERKCITY EPISODE pants: 9 HOLLYWOOD WRITERS pants: A STAFF OF HUNDREDS SUPPORTING deuce: MOSTLY COMPOSED OF HOMELESS PEOPLE, DAY WORKERS

pants: ABND ME MMEM KA UYOPF HE809T 6Y9HSIOFWS9YTE SOGE WOIG pants: ' : PANTS SDGJ;G

deuce: PEER INTO MY BALLS pants: I'M FEELING SLEEPY pants: VERY SLEEPY pants: WHAT IS YOUR COMMAND MASTER deuce: DO MY HOMEWORK FOR ME

deuce: DO MY HOMEWORK FOR ME pants: VERY WELL: 2 + 2 = 5 pants: I'M 15 YEARS OLD AND HAVE MY OWN HOMEWORK ZOMBIE !!!!! pants: 2 % 47 = 5 deuce: I'M THE LUCKIEST KID EVER pants: 9 * 9 * 9 = 5

spigot: HOMPH HOMPH DICKS spigot: HOMPH HOMPH PRICKS spigot: PLUH PTTH CUPCAKES spigot: I'M YOUR NEWS SOURCE pants: MY MAN ON THE STREET spigot: HURP HURP HURP SWINGING MY ARMS AND CLOMPING DOWN THE HALL deuce: BBBBBBBB BBBBBBB BBBBBB BBBBBB BBBBBB BONK spigot: WORKING ON MY PEOPLE SKILLS pants: I WISH YOU WOULD NOT STAND AT ATTENTION BY THE ESPRESSO MACHINE pants: I AM NOT THE ONE CHANGING THE GRIND spigot: THAT'S NOT THE NASA ROBOT ON MARS

deuce: I ATE A BIG DICK spigot: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE!!! HOMPTH HOMPTH NEXT

spigot: I MADE UP A GAY ABRAHAM LINCOLN JOKE BUT I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S FUNNY YET spigot: *AHEM* deuce: ZZZ deuce: SNORT spigot: FOUR JERK AND SEVEN SPURTS AGO deuce: WHAT deuce: GRUMBLE GRUMBLE deuce: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ spigot: GAYBRAHAM LINCOLN deuce: IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR CRITICAL ACCLAIM SIR I SHOULD POINT OUT THAT YOUR CHECK BOUNCED spigot: GAYBRAHAM LINCOLN deuce: ZZZZZZ

deuce: PEOPLE R DUMB pants: WHAT HAPPENED HONEY pants: WERE YOU MISTAKEN FOR A CALIFORNIA BLACK BEAR AGAIN deuce: HUHHHHHH ANNOYED EXHALE A BROWN BEAR pants: ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS NOT STEAL PICNIC BASKETS deuce: WELL ALL I WANT TO DO IS STEAL SAID BASKETS pants: LET'S AGREE TO DISAGREE pants: PULLS DOWN TROUSERS, REVEALS SWIM TRUNKS WORN AS UNDERWEAR)

spigot: RAMMING YOU LIKE A DUMB DYKE AND THEN DISPOSING OF YOU IN BARRELS OF CONCRETE THROUGHOUT THE SAN FERNANDO VALLEY

spigot: HONK BONK DONK (spigot): (CONTEMPLATED "PONK") pants: SOME MANNER OF VERY GAY SAN FRANCISCO PUBLIC PAYPHONE

deuce: T SPIGOT MY BALLS HAVE CONSISTENCY OF PLAY-DOH spigot: HONK HONK HONK HONK HONK FAT deuce: SNIFF

pants: HONK pants: HONK SEZ I pants: I SEZ HONK pants: HONK, SHE CRIED pants: HONK, HONK

spigot: honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk spigot: honk honk honk hnk hn h h h h h h h h h spigot: my horn is out of air spigot: i will just honk the air bags spigot: honk honk FOOMP

pants: SHARP HONKS AS MY HEAD IS POUNDED AGAINST THE STEERING WHEEL

pants: I JERK FOR JESUS pants: HE LOVES ME SO pants: SPURTING ON HIS TITS, ETC.

spigot: come for the bone, stay for the quest spigot: you put the cock sock / right on my dong / hoo / hoo spigot: sucking dick, next donahue

spigot: OKAY FOLKS I JUST HAVE TO SAY ONE THING spigot: I PROMISED MYSELF I WASN'T GOING TO CRY TODAY spigot: BUT THEN HOO HUH 10,000 MANIACS ON THE RADIO AND URF SOB DUH

spigot: HOW ABOUT I SINGLE OUT YOUR DICK!!! FOR LICKING!!!!! BY ME!!!!! pants: HURF BLURF DISNEYLAND TOILETS

spigot: I AM PLAYING HOOKY FROM WORK AND I NEED TO KNOW WHAT I SHOULD BUY AT THE STORE deuce: STRING CHEESE spigot: THAT DOESN'T EXACTLY CELEBRATE STAYING HOME

pants: jack me off???????? deuce: dial tone

spigot: i dont want my neighborhood gentrified spigot: i paid extra for the hooting and hollering spigot: when all the street people disappear it will be a sad day because no more free cirque du soleil out my window

spigot: I HOPE IT GETS SHOT ON THE BUS spigot: I HOPE IT GETS THROWN DOWN A WELL spigot: I HOPE IT GROWS UP UNGRATEFUL AND BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN

pants: need your hopes, your prayers pants: your soiled undergarments

atandt: HOPE FLOATS atandt: BUT NOT ALL MY POO FLOATS atandt: HELP ME OUT HERE deuce: I HAVE NO CONSTRUCTIVE ADVICE TO OFFER AT THIS JUNCTURE

spigot: hope someday i can fuck a real flashlight

spigot: I'M LOOKING AT MY HOPE FLOATING IN THE TOILET RIGHT NOW pants: MY HOPE JUST SINKS TO THE BOTTOM spigot: WELL WE'RE PRACTICALLY TWINS pants: NOT IF YOURS FLOATS spigot: TOO LATE I ALREADY PITCHED IT TO NBC pants: AUUUGH

deuce: WELL I DIDN'T USE ANY PUNCTUATION SO IT'S NOT ENTIRELY A SENTENCE BUT HOPEFULLY YOU GET THE POINT pants: MORE OR LESS YES pants: YES I DO pants: MOSTLY IT POKES MY FACE

spigot: T PANTS YOU SAID THERE WOULD BE CHICKS HERE pants: T SPIGOT OBVIOUSLY I LIED TO YOU pants: T SPIGOT DO CHICKS HAVE DICKS spigot: I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE pants: T SPIGOT HERE'S TO HOPING spigot: T PANTS AND GROPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

deuce: SDFHLSFH SLFH SUFHS LFHSLFHLEK HF HELP ME LSHF LKSHSLFHDSLH UIFH SFLHS FSH HOLY GOD NOT WITH THE BIG AUSTRALIAN BOOT AGLH FHS LSFH SLHSL UHDFL HSLFH LSDHF LSFH HELP FLS HFLSHF SLFUH SFUH SLF F BREATHING SLOWLY NOW HOPING IT WILL GO AWAY LAH LSFHSLUFSD FHSL HLUFHSLFH SLUHFL SHEFH ELFHSLKF

effigy: I need a horn section spigot: i.e. an erection

pants: PLEASE SUCK IT pants: AND/OR JACK ME OFF pants: I’M HORNY FOR SNAILS pants: REALLY ANY SORT OF INVERTEBRATES deuce: CRUSTACEANS ARE GAY pants: AMPHIBIANS ARE BI deuce: TOTALLY BI deuce: CETACEANS ARE STRAIGHT AS FUCK (AF) pants: IF I HAD TOP-LEVEL EYES LIKE THAT I’D BE SCANNING BOTH DIRECTIONS FOR DICK

spigot: if just one person hears this and licks a dick it will all be worth it pants: horny on main pants: what i thought were crispy delicious hot egg rolls were actually limp translucent ice cold spring rolls deuce: spring rolls are vaguely tolerable but NOT IF YOU THINK THEY'RE EGG ROLLS in which case they're the most horrible thing ever to happen to mankind pants: there can never be peace

deuce: IF PYTHON WERE A WOMAN, I WOULD FUCK IT deuce: AND deuce: IF PYTHON WERE A MAN, I WOULD STILL FUCK IT

pants: HEY SPIGSTER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: SOME KIND OF HORRIBLE PEE PARTY spigot: SPIGAROONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: AND THAT'S HOW I FEEL ABOUT GAY RABBITS

deuce: let's touch dicks pants: no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: just horrible, awful people pants: okay

spigot: MY MAIN PROBLEMS INCLUDE THE LOGIC AND HOW TO DISPLAY PIECES AND HOW THE GAME SHOULD PRETEND TO BE A PERSON AND HOW I CAN MAKE CHESS ICONS AND HOW I CAN REGISTER A DOMAIN AND THE RULES OF CHESS (HARD) FINALLY RELEASED!!!! IT'S CALLED HORSE ALONE ON A BOARD AND YOU MOVE HIM AROUND spigot: OKAY LEMME REBOOT spigot: SAD MAC

pants: getting stoned and watching the marx bros deuce: drowning you

spigot: horseplay pants: in the showers

deuce: WHAT'S A MASTODON NODE pants: SLANG FOR DILDO

: nfigurations/Platforms : o Other IRC Chat Rooms : rmation for Microsoft Chat : sked Questions : ---------------------------- : ted Configuration/Platforms : -------------------------------------------------- : Microsoft Chat currently runs under Windows 95, Windows 98 and W: : Microsoft Chat requires the following minimum configuration: : - A 486 processor : - 8 MB or RAM : - 256-color video : - A 9600-baud modem : ---------------------------- : Connecting to Other IRC Chat Rooms : ---------------------------- : If you want to connect to an IRC chat server that you already kn: : about, expand the Connect dialog box, then type the server a| : and channel name--for example, you might type the following:

spigot: GLGL pants: COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR CARRYING NOTHING spigot: HOLD ON!!!!!!!!! spigot: (BONG NOISES) pants: THIS IS YOUR LAST WARNING (SAID THROUGH BULLHORN)

pants: MY STARBUCKS LID BROKE deuce: STRETCH YOUR BALL SACK AROUND THE TOP AND SECURE IT WITH A RUBBER BAND pants: CAN I STILL BIKE TO WORK pants: OKAY YOU'RE GONE pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: NOW I NEED ICED COFFEE

deuce: SO IF I KICK YOU IN YOUR CUNT DO YOU GET ALL HOT AND BOTHERED deuce: IF I PUNCH YOUR DUMB ACCENTED MOUTH IN THE FACE WILL YOU GET ALL JUICY FOR MY DICK net: I'D PREFER IT IF YOU PUNCHED MY NUTS deuce: SHUT THE FUCK I'LL GET TO YOU WHEN I'M DAMN GOOD AND READY

effigy: WOULD YOU LIKE TO ADD A PROTEIN? deuce: N effigy: HOW ABOUT A JAVASCRIPT INJECTION? deuce: N effigy: ...MAYBE FOR DESSERT THEN. deuce: N effigy: AND FUCK TOM BRADY deuce: NNNNNNNYES

deuce: HYPERBOLIC deuce: SYLLABIC deuce: SESQUEDALYMISTIC

spigot: H H H H H HOTDOGS ???? HOT DOGS spigot: HOT / DOGS spigot: I DON'T WANT TO GET OFF ON A RANT HERE, BUT . . . . . . . . . . . spigot: **********URK SPLURK********** spigot: (GOT OFF SORRY)

: This little lad loves berries and cream pants: DELICIOUS HOT DOGS pants: THEY CAN'T RUN FROM ME

atandt: HURF BLURF THROWING UP LIKE THE DEUCE atandt: UUGHUHGHGH atandt: WEINERSCHNITZEL spigot: HOT DOGS RECALLED deuce: NOOOO

spigot: IS ANYONE HERE HOT FOR TEACHER?!?!?!? JUST MOI?!?!?! deuce: T SPIGOT YOU HAVE BEEN SMOKING WAY TOO MUCH POT spigot: TO EASE THE CRUSHING PAIN OF MODERN LIFE deuce: I ON THE OTHER HAND DRINK TO FEEL AN INFLATED SENSE OF SELF-ESTEEM

spigot: IS IT HOT IN HERE spigot: BLGHLBHGLBHGLBHGLBH YOU ARE SHAKING ME LIKE AN INFANT

deuce: OKAY WHO'S UP FOR SOME HOT J/O? spigot: NOT ME (spigot): ME

spigot: I WISH SOMEONE WOULD RIG MY BALLTOSS pants: I'D LIKE THAT

:: NEITHER (LEFT, "SPIGOT", RIGHT, "ATANDT") SUBJECT SUFFERS FROM A MAJOR MENTAL DEFECT THEY DO NOT AUTOMATICALLY QUALIFY FOR AN INSANITY DEFENSE spigot: FROM NOW ON PLEASE CALL ME HOTNUTS atandt: WHY IS THERE CORN IN THE TOILET spigot: I'M SURE I DON'T KNOW

deuce: I'M A HOT POCKET pants: PUTTING YOU INTHE CRISPING SLEEVE deuce: FUCK YEAH deuce: THIS MEANS I'M BEING TREATED SPECIALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NOOOOOOOOOOOO MICROWAVED AND KILLED

net: WELL I FINISHED THE LEFTOVER PONTILLOS PIZZA AND THE LEFTOVER FROZEN PIZZA AND NOW I'M GOING FOR THE PIZZA-FLAVORED CROISSANT POCKETS AND THEN ANYTHING REMOTELY SHAPED LIKE OR IN THE SAME ROOM AS PIZZA deuce: HONK deuce: I HAVE MY WANG STUCK IN A HOT POCKET SO SNAP IT UP MOTHERFUCKER net: WAS THE HOT POCKET COOKED OR NO deuce: I WILL GET BACK TO YOU ON THAT

spigot: I'M PH-BALANCED FOR HOT PRICKS spigot: HOT MEANING THEY BURN MY MOUTH spigot: I NEED SOME CORT-AID

atandt: HERE IS OUR NEXT EXPLOSIVE STOCK PICK: pants: IS THAT LIKE MY HOT TIP atandt: HGLAGHLAUHGULHALG HALUG ALUGH LAGH LUAHGLUH AULGHULA HGUL HALGHLUAHLGAG deuce: I WILL BLOW ON IT UNTIL IT COOLS DOWN deuce: WHEN HE SAID EXPLOSIVE HE WASN'T KIDDING MURRMPHL pants: YOU POOR MAN

deuce: PENIS LIFE spigot: I LIVE IN HOTEL DUMBSHIT

spigot: I THINK I COULD BEST SUM THINGS UP WITH A MOUTHFUL spigot: COULD HOTMAIL BY MY SOLUTION??????????????????? spigot: LET'S GO AROUND THE ROOM STARTING WITH ME spigot: HONK deuce: HURRR pants: WENDY'S BIGGIE FRIES spigot: PANTLEGS deuce: YOU DON'T GET TO GO TWICE

: "Have you seen my bong?" : Deuce just looked at him. "Uh.." : Spigot continued over him: "It's blue and probably full of dirty water." : Deuce, having eaten the bong hours ago (filthy bongwater and all) said nothing. spigot: FUCK YOU / FUCK YOU / FUCK YOU / FUCK YOU deuce: YOUR RIGHTS ONLINE spigot: ARE OUR MODEL RELEASE FORMS SAFE

deuce: HALP I'M SURROUNDED BY FAGGOTS

pants: NEVER EVER WALK INTO THE FISTING ROOM UNLESS YOU REALLY WANT TO BE IN THERE pants: YOU REALLY HAVE TO RESEARCH IT BEFORE YOU WALK IN pants: SO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING INTO pants: THERE'S A LOT OF COMPLICATED PAPERWORK pants: YOU HAVE TO TIP THE DOORMAN pants: NEVER, EVER GET INTO THE SWING BEFORE YOUR NUMBER IS CALLED pants: AND BE SURE TO SMILE

deuce: HOUSTON WE'VE HAD A PROBLEM pants: YOU HAVE TO SAY OVER !!! deuce: T PANTS NO THEY HAVE A BLEEPY THING FOR THAT (OVER) pants: BEEP BOOP BOOP HOW DO I GET LINUX TO RECOGNIZE ATA DRIVES spigot: MY CD PLAYER IS SQUEAKING AND SQUAWKING LIKE MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND

spigot: HEY LADY HOW ABOUT A BLOWJOB?????????? spigot: NO I MEAN YOU -> ME spigot: A SLOBJOB THEN????????? STRANGLING YOU ANYWAY spigot: HURLKGLK THAT'S RIGHT spigot: SURPRISE YOU'RE AN IDIOT GHLGHLGHKK spigot: GHLRLGKL SAY WHAT???? SPEAK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LGHLGHLKR spigot: HELLO

pants: INSTEAD OF SAYING YOU'RE GOING TO DRILL MY ASS HOW ABOUT INSTEAD WE SAY EXPLORE

spigot: HOW / ARE YA FIXED / FOR :POINT_RIGHT::SKIN-TONE-2: FARTS :POINT_LEFT::SKIN-TONE-2: spigot: THE WITNESS MAY ANSWER

pants: DID WE SPEAK ABOUT PRICKS AND MORE SPECIFICALLY HOW YOU ARE FIXED FOR THEM

spigot: DEAR MOM!!! YOU MIGHT WANT TO MOVE TO MEXICO ON SEP 10 spigot: LOVE OSAMA spigot: P.S. STILL DID NOT GET CHECK

spigot: T PANTS HOW ARE YOU VOTING ON PROPOSITION B spigot: T PANTS WHAT ABOUT PROPOSITION J spigot: T PANTS ARE YOU STILL TYPING YOUR ANSWER

deuce: YOU'LL HAVE TO INVOKE THE TWENTY-FIFTH AMENDMENT TO GET MY DICK OUT OF YOUR FACE

spigot: HOW CAN I NAVIGATE THE NET WHEN I CAN'T EVEN NAVIGATE MY NUTS pants: IF YOU'D ONLY APPLY YOURSELF

deuce: OKAY GLHGHLGHGLHGHLGHLGLHGHL

pants: WHAT IF I PASS OUT BEFORE I COME TO atandt: GET OUT OF HERE pants: HOW CAN I TELL IF YOU'RE REAL OR NOT atandt: I SAID GET OUT pants: WHERE WILL I GO, WHAT WILL I DO atandt: PLEASE LEAVE AS I AM ACTUALLY TAKING A SHIT bung: YOU HEARD HIM, SHOO

deuce: IT'S LIKE I'M A HOOKER bung: HOW CHEAP (LOOKING AT A PILE OF CHANGE IN MY HAND) deuce: A CHEAP CHEAP HOOKER deuce: CHEAPER THAN YOU WOULD IMAGINE bung: PUTTING THE QUARTERS BACK IN MY POCKET

deuce: HOW COME YOU NEVER INVITE ME deuce: OH deuce: NEVER MIND

spigot: HOW COOL WILL IT BE WHEN WE CAN SHIT ON OUR PHONES AND FOLD THEM LIKE A WAFFLE IRON

spigot: HOW DARE YOU CLAIM YOU'VE GOT THE MOST EROTIC TEENS spigot: WHEN CLEARLY spigot: SPA-QUIRK NEVER MIND I STOPPED CARING

pants: WELL ACCORDING TO WEATHER.COM'S UP TO THE MINUTE ACCUCAST I'M A FAG deuce: HOW DID IT KNOW pants: NEXRAD SAYS I'M A FAG TOO deuce: HOW DID IT KNOW pants: OH GOD ALL THE VISIBLE SATELLITES ARE FLASHING FAG FAG FAG (OPEN YOUR WINDOW, LOOK UP) deuce: HOW DID IT KNOW

deuce: A HUGE ACCIDENT INVOLVING POO AND BONERS (pants): HOW DID YOU KNOW

pants: PLEASE LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD AND NOT DOWN AT ME AS I WORK spigot: THEN HOW DO I KNOW ITS YOU pants: PLEASE NO TALKING spigot: I WAS FUCKING FINISHED TEN MINUTES AGO PLEASE LEAVE

spigot: IF YOU'RE A WOMAN, HOW DO YOU GET ON THE INTERNET WITHOUT A MAN? YOU *CAN'T*

pants: sure it feels good to sleep in and drink a freshly-ground cup of coffee but have you tried cocksucking pants: well how do you know you wouldn't like it

pants: please suck it deuce: never pants: how do you know you won't like it till you suck it for 10-20 mins pants: we can listen to a podcast during

pants: DICKS deuce: DICKS pants: T SPIGOT NOW YOU SAY DICKS!!! spigot: DICKS deuce: NOW WE CAN ALL SHOOT UP A SCHOOL/ WORKPLACE/ CHURCH/ MALL

pants: HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL deuce: LIKE A NATURAL WOMAN pants: I'M A README FILE spigot: DO YOU DARE ME TO REOPEN THE X FILES hanford: WILL BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP pants: NOT ONE OF THE FANCY ONES, A README.1ST FROM A DOS APPLICATION

spigot: how far will this desperate father go to protect his family spigot: i can't reach the remote

spigot: QUICK QUESTION: HOW FAR WOULD YOU GO TO PROTECT YOUR FAMILY deuce: I'D SUCK -1 DICKS deuce: NAN DICKS pants: NULL deuce: (NULL) deuce: `UNDEFINED` pants: SO NO DICKS THEN deuce: I HAVE NO IDEA ANYMORE pants: WELL LET'S TABLE THIS DISCUSSION

spigot: THAT'S NEAT HOW VOID POINTERS CAN TAKE ANY KIND OF DATA spigot: NOTE: (spigot): BUT NOT DATA PERTAINING TO HOW QUEER AND FAT I AM

pants: WHO STUFFED HER MOUTH WITH AN OILY RAG ???? pants: THIS IS AWFUL pants: SOMEBODY GET A CLEAN DISHTOWEL

deuce: SO GAY I MASTURBATE TO GIRLS

deuce: I AM SO GAY I SEE SPOTS

pants: I KEEP TELLING YOU GUYS, WE JUST NEED TO ALL JOIN ARMS AND WALK INTO THE SEA pants: IT'S FOR THE BEST, REALLY

spigot: SUCKING YOUR OWN DICK IS HARD pants: THAT'S HOW I HURT MY BACK

pants: BEATING OFF TO THE CRUMB SOUNDTRACK

spigot: ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT BANANARAMA pants: {{FISH-STUB}} deuce: ALL THREE OF US ARE PERFECTLY MATCHED TO JERK EACH OTHER OFF

: Pictured below: "spigot" AKA "spigot the bear" (left), "deuce" (right) spigot: HOW LONG WERE YOU OUTSIDE MY WINDOW deuce: YIPES spigot: WHAT DID YOU SEE

PANTS: MOSTLY SUCKING NOISES PANTS: I SEE PANTS: HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON PANTS: I SEE PANTS: ALL RIGHT THEN

deuce: HOW MANY STARDATES BEFORE THE KLINGONS TAKE CONTROL OF MY NUTS

spigot: A ONE spigot: A TWO spigot: PHREE POUR PIVE spigot: PIX PEVEN APE spigot: MIME spigot: PEN spigot: ELEMMM spigot: PEM deuce: I HEARD APE