half off

"half off" | Wednesday, August 26, 1998 | No. 9
spigot: I AM SERIOUSLY PERTURBED WITH REGARD TO HOW MANY CHIPS WERE ACTUALLY IN THE BIG PUFFY BAG
spigot: MMF URMPH YOU ARE SHAKING ME AND SETTLING ME AND FINALLY SHIPPING ME
pants: I WILL SHELVE YOU (PRICING GUN)
spigot: I AM HALF OFF WITH A LUCKY REWARDS CARD
pants: I AM INSTRUCTING OTHERS NOT TO CHECK YOU FOR RIPENESS, ETC.







Tomorrow
"your toebeans, your pisspots" featuring pants




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"Slurping and drooling and hurrrr."



Est. 1998
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Cosmic forces (otherwise known as "bonghits") are at work here.
Jerkcity was not supposed to have continued through 2017.
It should be clear to all that mistakes were made somewhere.