deuce: HUMPING VS. HUMPED spigot: THREE COINS IN A FOUNTAIN pants: PIGGYBACK

spigot: shitting out the pillars of creation spigot: more like the poollars of creation spigot: okay they won't go down the toilet spigot: now the entire universe is flooded spigot: where's that dipper

deuce: BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE YOU'VE CHOSEN THE RIGHT PATH?!?!?!? pants: OH I'M STICKING WITH THE PILLS => ADDICTION => SUCKING DICKS FOR PILLS PATH deuce: OH OKAY GOOD deuce: THIS IS JUST A SIDE QUEST

spigot: WILL YOU PLEASE GET YOUR PILOT'S LICENSEAND PLOW A PLANE INTO THE NEW APPLE BUILDING deuce: DONE AND DONE

spigot: A :POTATO: IN MY :PANTS:

spigot: HOW CAN I MANAGE THE NET WHEN I'M SCRAMBLING AROUND TRYING TO MANAGE ALL THESE DICKS spigot: SEEKING A SOLUTION spigot: PINGING AND SWINGING AND TRYING TO STUFF PEOPLE IN THE STALL (IT'S 5PM)

spigot: I TOOK THE SOAP DISPENSER OFF THE WALL AND INTO THE TOILET WITH ME spigot: WHO'S UP FOR A PINK LEMONY SUDSY HAND JOB

spigot: ON ANDROID PHONES THE BROADCASTIFY APP SOMEHOW MAINTAINS A SECOND AUDIO STREAM SO YOU CAN LISTEN TO THE CLEVELAND METRO HOUSING AUTHORITY AND PIPE ORGAN CIRCUS MUSIC

spigot: I'M DETECTIVE SHERLOCK HOLMES PUFFING A PIPE IN A FOGGY, RAIN-SOAKED CITYSCAPE spigot: NOW I'M A DUSTY FRONTIER COWBOY IN THE WILD WEST DESTINED FOR A SHOOTOUT AT HIGH NOON spigot: SURPRISE: I'M A KNIGHT ON A QUEST TO SLAY DRAGONS WITH MINIMAL COMPLEXITY spigot: THANKS FOR A HOLODECK WITH EXACTLY THREE SETTINGS

deuce: I CAN JUST BARELY SEE YOU ALL THROUGH THE PISS CURTAIN pants: DO YOU MEAN THE CURTAIN OF PISS pants: OR THE PISS CURTAINS IN THE LIVING ROOM/BEDROOM/DINING ROOM pants: IT'S MORE OF A NEVER-ENDING WATERFALL spigot: OH YOU MEAN YOU AND YOUR TWELVE FRIENDS STANDING ABOVE ME IN A SEMI-CIRCLE spigot: THAT'S CLEVER AND CREATIVE pants: THERE ARE MORE ABOVE IN THE RAFTERS/CATACOMBS

deuce: I SMELL OF PISS AND SADNESS deuce: GRIEF deuce: DESPAIR deuce: I SMELL OF A LOT OF THINGS

pants: PLASTIC BAGGIE OF PISS

pants: AUTO-VIVIFICATION pants: DOES PISS HAVE CARBS pants: THIS NEXT SONG IS ABOUT A DICKLICKER WHO LICKS DICK deuce: (LOOKS AT WATCH, LOOKS BACK UP, BORED) spigot: TAKE A MOMENT TO SUCK THESE DONGS! spigot: WHO IS THIS spigot: THE HUMAN LIFESPAN IS WAY WAY WAY WAY TOO LONG spigot: I COULDA STOPPED 30 YEARS AGO

deuce: a chalice filled with piss pants: PISS CHALICE

pants: DO YOU KNOW ABOUT PISS CHRIST pants: DO YOU BELIEVE

deuce: PISS CLAMS / PISS CLAMS / THE BEST CLAMS / IN SI-AM

deuce: piss clams pants: digging in the sand for them pants: boiling them (in piss) deuce: feeding them pills pants: putting them back in the sand

pants: PISS CRISIS!!!!!! SEND IN THE MARINES deuce: THE POSSE COMITATUS ACT PREVENTS FROM SENDING IN THE MARINES DURING A PISS CRISIS

pants: YOUR SEARCH - "PISS DRINKERS LOCAL UNION" OR "PISS DRINKERS UNION" -... pants: ...DID NOT MATCH ANY DOCUMENTS. pants: SUGGESTIONS: pants: MAKE SURE ALL WORDS ARE SPELLED CORRECTLY. pants: TRY DIFFERENT KEYWORDS. pants: TRY MORE GENERAL KEYWORDS : PANTS HAS BEEN SENDING MESSAGES TO YOU TOO RAPIDLY, AND IS NOW BEING IGNORED.

deuce: MMMM WARM TANGY PEE deuce: I MEAN GROSS EWWW WHO'D EVER DRINK PEE

pants: PISS FIGHT (HANDING OUT DIXIE CUPS AND SPLASH GUARDS) atandt: THIS IS A FAMILY MOO SIR atandt: SOON TO BE A DUKES OF HAZZARD THEME PARK pants: WITH ANY LUCK

pants: DO CRICKETS PISS deuce: ZZZ pants: IF THEY DO I THINK WE SHOULD REMAKE WILLY WONKA STARRING JOHNNY DEPP deuce: ZZZZ deuce: DO ANDROIDS DREAM OF ELECTRIC PISS pants: IF THEY'RE PISS FREAKS LIKE ME AND HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED TO DO SO, YES

pants: POKE ME WITH A RAKE (OR A BROOM, WHATEVER) deuce: ALL I HAVE HERE IS A MOP deuce: WHICH IS SUSPICIOUSLY DAMP pants: FINE, FINE

spigot: HI spigot: PISS MY FACE UP LIKE IT'S A GAY FIRE RAGING OUT OF THE CLOSET spigot: OR DON'T pants: NO EXIT

pants: PISS TAKES !!!!! pants: PFFFFTFTFT pants: PFFT (LAST LITTLE BIT) pants: PFT pants: PFTFTFTFTFFFFFT pants: PFT deuce: SPIT IT OUT SON

pants: PISS TESTING IN PROGRESS PLEASE STAND BACK REPEAT PLEASE STAND BACK pants: :ROTATING_LIGHT: deuce: ABSORBED DOSE: 573 MSV pants: SOME PISS deuce: QUANTITY: 6.2 L pants: THAT’S WHAT I SAID, YEAH

deuce: P-P-P deuce: P-P-P deuce: PISS VIDS

pants: SQUIRT deuce: SQUIRT pants: NOW THAT IS WHAT I CALL PRECISION deuce: TAKE THAT YOU EVIL AXIS

pants: BURGERS COOKED IN PISS

spigot: I FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE THIS IS ALL FOR SOME PISSCAM PROJECT BUT I'M TRYING HARD TO HOLD STEADY

pants: PISSING ON BITCHES AND RUNNING AWAY LIKE A PHANTOM OF THE OPERA WHO PISSES

spigot: SOMETIMES I WAKE UP AND MY DOLLS ARE ALL IN MY UNDERWEAR spigot: THAT'S NOT RIGHT (atandt): HMM spigot: SO I'VE LEARNED TO GO WITHOUT UNDERWEAR atandt: AHSO spigot: I'M IN BED PISSING AND SQUIRTING atandt: I'M UH spigot: WHERE DID DEUCE GO atandt: HE UH

pants: T DEUCE MY SCI-FI TV SERIES IS CALLED "PISSJACKERS"

pants: P I S S P I G S deuce: I PROCLAIM NO FOREKNOWLEDGE OF THAT MESSAGE

deuce: AND WHILE YOU ARE DISTRACTED I ASSFUCK YOU pants: PITCHFORKS AND TORCHES

spigot: WHERE'S THAT PIZZA spigot: BLRHLBUHRLUBHRLUBHLGHRLHGHRLBHLUGHBLULH PLUH BLUHH I AM SO SORRY spigot: HLLLLLLLLLLGBHLHRLUHLBRHLGUHLLUH HUH HUH I JUST CAN'T KEEP ANYTHING DOWN pants: MY SHOES spigot: BLGUBHGLUBHRLUBHRTLUBHRLGURHLBURHGLUBRHGLUB MY FAULT

deuce: PIZZA AND DEAD BABIES HERE pants: WHAT KIND OF PIZZA

spigot: MY FAVORITE FOOD IS PIZZA deuce: I ALSO LIKE LASAGNA!!! :pants,: YOUR TURN, SAY SOMETHING CLEVER pants: WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, LICK A DICK

pants: MAY I PLEASE HAVE A TREAT PLACED ON THE TOP OF MY TONGUE pants: I WILL KEEP MY EYES CLOSED deuce: GRATE MY BALLS deuce: JUST RUN 'EM AGAINST A CHEESE GRATER UNTIL THEY'RE GONE

spigot: SHOW ME A WOMAN ARTIST ANYWHERE ON THE PLANET spigot: HURRR THESE ARE MY AZTEC LESBIAN FONDUE POTS spigot: THESE ARE PLACEMATS AND BATHMATS

pants: > CHOKE RAPIST deuce: > GIVE COIN TO RAPIST deuce: > TIP RAPIST pants: > WEAR FEDORA

dick: IF YOU WERE A MOUNTAIN, YOU'D BE MT. REALLY QUEER dick: IF YOU WERE A PLANET, YOU'D BE PLANET SQUIRMY DICK dick: IF I WERE A CARTOON CHARACTER, I'D BE BLONDIE BUMSTEAD deuce: HUNGRY FOR COCK

pants: BARF ON MY WEIRD LITTLE BONER pants: DON'T MAKE ME BEG pants: ACTUALLY, NEVER THE MIND I MANAGED TO WORK SOMETHING OUT

pants: WE SHOULD DISCUSS YOUR VIOLATIONS OF MY 7-BIT STRUCTURE (RE: RAMMING YOUR COCK INTO MY FLOWER BEDS) deuce: I'M PLANTING SEEDS pants: YOU HAVE SCARED THE GOPHERS OFF (WHICH IS GOOD) BUT ALSO DEFORESTED THE REGION (MAKING IT UNINHABITABLE FOR 900 YEARS) deuce: HOLD STILL pants: MY CHILDREN WILL SING PRAISE UNTO YOU FROM THEIR SECOND MOUTH OR GILLS (PRETTY MUCH WE HAVE TO KEEP THE LITTLE ONE UNDERWATER AT ALL TIMES) deuce: I SAID HOLD STILL

spigot: HOOOOOOOOOOO WHEN DINOSAURS ROAMED THE EARTH spigot: HONK DONK pants: GAY DINOSAURS??? WHAT THE spigot: I EAT PLANTS AND LEAVES AND OVER THE COURSE OF CENTURIES EVENTUALLY NUTS AND BALLS spigot: THAT'S RIGHT I'M THE PRICKOSAURUS DONGS pants: MARTY NO spigot: DISTANT RELATIVE OF THE COCKOSAURUS NUTS pants: DOC STOP

deuce: eat a bowl of dicks pants: i prefer my dicks on a plate

spigot: GODDAMMIT WHO KEEPS FLUSHING MY POOS DOWN THE TOILET deuce: MY POOS ARE PLATONIC deuce: (IN THAT THEY ARE ALL SHAPED LIKE THE PLATONIC SOLIDS)

pants: HANDS BEHIND HEAD, LEANING BACK, OKAY, NOW: BEAT ME OFF deuce: WHY ISN'T IT HARD pants: WELL pants: MAYBE TAKE OFF YOUR TOP, DANCE AROUND A LITTLE, BREAK OUT THE SOCK PUPPETS

deuce: ANYONE WANT TO PLAY DENTIST deuce: SERIOUSLY ?!?!?! LET'S PLAY DENTIST deuce: I'LL PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH deuce: AND THEN YOU'LL PUNCH ME IN THE MOUTH deuce: AND THEN WE'LL KISS FOR THREE HOURS

spigot: SUCKING DICK BEHIND THE FAKE SALOON FRONT AT THE PLAYGROUND spigot: GETTING CAUGHT AND MOVING THREE FEET TO THE FAKE JAIL

spigot: IF YOU CAN POSSIBLY BL@(B$*}}}}}}}} pants: LINE NOISE CAPTAIN pants: WHAT SHOULD WE DO spigot: DUNK ME IN GLITTER AND BATTER MY BALLS AND CARPOOL ME TO THE EIGHTIES MASHUP

spigot: PANTS AND DEUCE WILL NOT BE AROUND FOR A WHILE (ARRESTED BY S.H.I.E.L.D.) spigot: I ASKED YOU TO PLAY WITH MY BALLS IN A GENTLE SQUEEZY WAY AND INSTEAD YOU PINCH THEM, KICK THEM TO THE POINT OF NUMBNESS AND BLUENESS?????????????? spigot: THAT IS NO WAY TO BEHAVE

deuce: IF YOU EAT PLAY-DOH YOU WILL SHIT IT OUT deuce: ^^^ TRUE STORY ^^^ spigot: LIKE IN FUNNY SHAPES ??

spigot: I THINK DEUCE IS PLAYING BOGGLE spigot: I PLACE MY EAR TO THE DOOR OF HIS OFFICE AND I HEAR "BOGGLE GOGGLE HOGGLE" FOR LIKE FIFTEEN MINUTES AND IT'S LOCKED spigot: FREE TO BE FILLED WITH DICK deuce: I CAN'T SPELL THAT WITH THESE LETTERS

pants: SOMEONE'S STIFF spigot: THAT SOMEONE IS ME .(plant): COCKS

deuce: T PANTS I WOULD LIKE A SALAD WITH RANCH DRESSING THANK YOU deuce: T PANTS COULD I ALSO GET CURLY FRIES pants: T DEUCE YOU DO NOT DESERVE CURLY FRIES (PLACING THEM BACK ON THE HOTPLATE) deuce: T PANTS HOLY WHAT THE

spigot: DEAR BITCH spigot: SOMETIMES WHEN I WATCH YOU PLAYING SOLITAIRE spigot: I WANT TO GO OVER TO YOU AND JUST SMASH YOUR FACE IN spigot: OTHER TIMES I LOOK AT YOU IN THE DOPEY PINK SUITS YOU spigot: SEEM TO LIKE KNITTING FOR YOURSELF AND I WONDER spigot: HOW YOU'D LIKE TO TAKE A FAT DICK IN THE ASS spigot: ANYWAY, WRITE BACK.

pants: *last night's playtest:* pants: 59 logins, 32 unique players pants: 9 quests completed (that weren't just "Leave the public restroom") pants: 90 chat lines pants: 140 parse errors (may or may not be real bugs) pants: 15 critical errors pants: 1 crash pants: 0 bones found

pants: PLAYTEST RESULTS (UPDATED): pants: 144 LOGINS pants: 100 CRITICAL ERRORS pants: 16 QUESTS COMPLETED pants: 61 INCIDENTS OF PLAYERS KISSING TOILETS FOR SOME REASON pants: 324 CHAT LINES pants: SEVERAL CRASHES (SORRY EVERYBODY) pants: ZERO BONES FOUND

spigot: PLEASE STRENGTHEN MY EASTERN FLANK

spigot: TRYING TO WORK ON MY PEOPLE SKILLS spigot: PLEASE MAY I SUCK IT SIR

spigot: PLEASE BE ADVISED YOU ALL LICK DICK effigy: K spigot: SOOTHING QUEERSCAPES

pants: AM I DOOMED TO LIVE LIKE A TEENAGED GIRL FOREVER pants: MY CLOTHES ARE IN PILES ALL OVER MY ROOM pants: WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE ????????????????? deuce: T PANTS PLEASE BE SEATED

spigot: I SWEAR I BOTTLED UP ALL MY URINE spigot: PUT DOWN THE STICK spigot: I CAN BE QUIET spigot: PLEASE CALL MY BBS

spigot: DEAR SIR, THANKS FOR THE JPEGS OF YOUR FAT, DUMB WIFE. spigot: ALSO THANKS FOR BLURRING HER FACE WITH SOME STUPID GRAPHICS PROGRAM spigot: WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR SUBMISSION DOES NOT SUIT OUR PRESENT NEEDS spigot: VERY TRULY YOURS, FIVE KNOBBY COCKS IN YOUR IDIOT FACE spigot: P.S. PLEASE CALL THE ENCLAVE BUT NOT AFTER 6PM

deuce: I'M XML; PLEASE DEPRECATE ME pants: (CHANTING) XML / XML / XML

net: PLEASE DESCRIBE YOURSELF net: [X] INDEPENDENT net: [X] RATIONAL net: [X] A GODDAMN LYING BITCH deuce: THAT'S THE PAIN TALKING

pants: PLEASE DO MY HOMEWORK FOR ME atandt: FIRST TAKE YOUR ATABRINE

pants: PLEASE DO THE NEEDFUL (WHICH AS IT TURNS OUT IS TO WATCH MY DICK/BALLS COMBO DO WHEELIES IN THE PARKING LOT FOR THE REST OF THE AFTERNOON)

pants: I SAID PELLEGRINO IN THE SMALL GLASS BOTTLES NOT THE MEDIUM SIZED PLASTIC BOTTLES spigot: THIS IS ***PERRIER*** ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND

bung: PLEASE DON'T TELL ME HOW BAD YOU NEED TO EJACULATE atandt: PLZ FIX

pants: PLEASE PISS ON ME deuce: WHAT WILL I GET IN RETURN FOR THE AFOREMENTIONED PISS deuce: I MEAN I GET A LOT OF OFFERS; WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO FOR ME deuce: PLEASE EXECUTE ME pants: UP AGAINST THE WALL

pants: PLEASE FILL THE SILO WITH CORN AND THEN PLEASE PUT ME IN THE SILO

deuce: HUHHUHUHUHUHUH CHUCK WOLLERY PLEASE FIND ME A DATE deuce: GGHLGGHGLGHLGLGH OKAY HAVING SEX WITH CHUCK WOLLERY deuce: I THINK I MADE A LOVE CONNECTION

spigot: PLEASE FOLLOW ME DOWN THE HALLWAY ASKING ME QUESTIONS

pants: T DEUCE WOULD YOU PLEASE GRADE MY PAPER deuce: E- pants: T DEUCE WHAT ABOUT MY CITIZENSHIP AND ABILITY TO STUFF MORE PRICKS IN MY MOUTH THAN THE KING OF SIAM deuce: T PANTS I WILL HAVE TO CHECK UP ON THAT ONE pants: T DEUCE PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ABOUT THIS

pants: I'M HARD deuce: WHO ISN'T pants: YOU APPARENTLY pants: GET HARD PLEASE pants: THANK YOU

: RADICAL : RAVE

spigot: DOES ANYBODY HERE KNOW HOW TO HOOK MY QUICKCAM UP TO MY ROOMMATE

pants: SERIOUSLY PLEASE HELP ME POO pants: MAYBE TAKE ME TO HOT DOG ON A STICK OR SOMETHING pants: POSTING “WILL SUCK DICK FOR OXY” TO CRAIGSLIST FOR SFBAY, MODESTO, FRESNO

spigot: ? PLEASE HOLD FOR MY PENIS pants: YOUR CALL IS IMPORTANT TO US

pants: PLEASE KEEP THE DOOR CLOSED!!!! SUCKING THINGS OFF INSIDE, DON'T WANT TO LET THE JIZZ BUGS OUT

spigot: PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE ON MY FACE deuce: T SPIGOT'S FACE GET OVER HERE

spigot: I WISH WE COULD ALL TAKE TURNS POKING AND CHOKING ME pants: KNOCK KNOCK SERIOUSLY HERE ARE SOME CLEAN TOWELS AND BATH OILS AND PRECIOUS LOTIONS AND ADVANCED SKIN CONDITIONERS AND FOR GOD'S SAKE LET ME COME IN THE BATHROOM WITH YOU deuce: PLEASE COULD WE NOT GET INTO A BIG KNOCK-DOWN DRAG-OUT HAIR-PULLING FIGHT FOR ONCE ?????/

pants: MORE AND FASTER pants: YOU HEARD ME RIGHT deuce: I AM RUN DOWN PLEASE LET ME REST pants: BUT

deuce: PLEASE RATE OUR APP pants: THIS IS ALL VERY EXCITING BUT I’M A FAG

pants: PLEASE FART ON ME deuce: FARTING ON YOU, AYE pants: BEING FARTED ON

spigot: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS spigot: PLEASE PASS ALL TRAFFIC THROUGH NET CONTROL spigot: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS

deuce: T SPIGOT BUT THAT IS A NORMAL CIGARETTE NOT A JOINT spigot: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?!!?!? spigot: AND PLEASE PASS NINE PIZZAS!!!!!!! spigot: IN A FLOORWISE FASHION

spigot: PLEASE PASS THE DICK deuce: NO spigot: PLEASE PASS THE DICK deuce: NO!!!!!!!! spigot: PASS THE DICK??????? pants: MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON THE MOTHERFUCKING PLANE

spigot: BONEQUEST PANNED AS E-WASTE

deuce: PLEASE REMEMBER THIS: deuce: MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS deuce: PLEASE ACCEPT THIS APOLOGY ON BEHALF OF MY BALLS, THEY HAVE BEEN OVERWORKED AND OVERWROUGHT AND DO NOT SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS NOT APPROPRI MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS MY BALLS

spigot: I'LL BE HOLDING AN INFORMAL NETWORK SECURITY SEMINAR IN THE PARKING LOT DURING LUNCH spigot: IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO BRING POTATO SALAD spigot: ALSO WOULD THE PERSON WHO MASTURBATED ON MY DESK PLEASE RETURN MY COAT

pants: T DEUCE PLEASE SEND NAKED PHOTOS deuce: ASAP deuce: THAT MEANS WITH EXTRA JERKSAUCE

spigot: PLEASE SIGN MY PETITION TO BRING SPIGOT THE BEAR BACK TO FOX pants: WHAT HAPPENED WITH SHOWTIME spigot: BUCKLES AND / BUCKLES AND spigot: BUCKLES AND BOWS

deuce: OKAY SIR YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH NOW PLEASE STEP BACK pants: I'M ON A MISSION FROM BONG pants: CALL US ANY TIME pants: OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY